mylifebyandrearaven

I was asked a question the other day by a non trans male "What does it feel like when you dress and do you feel like a woman?"  So taking the second part first. This is a hard thing to get my head around. The phrase "A transgender woman is a woman" is, in my mind important and meaningful, but do I feel like a woman? Well the answer is I don't know, as I don't know what a woman feels, or anybody feels for that matter. What I do know is what I feel, how that compares with a genetic woman I don't know. A lot of crossdressers will tell you 'it's not just about the clothes, it's much more than that', which of course is completely true, they often go on to say 'dressing is an expression of their femininity' which again is true. But the clothes play an enormous part, certainly in my life, I love women's clothes and always have. The differences between traditional male and female clothing is obvious, but in the modern world t...

With the continuing lockdown here in the UK many of us are at home, frustrated by being unable to do the things we want to do but realising the need to stay at home in order to minimise the risk of the virus spreading.  The good thing about being at home is that I don't have to get up at 05.00 in the morning to go to work, the day is much more leisurely and I can basically do as much or as little as I want to. It also give us that precious commodity that we never seem to have enough of, time..........Having more time is a good thing, it gives you time to think, again a good thing. But it also means you have time to go over some of the less pleasant times in our past.  And  so it happened to me, only a week or so ago, I ended up discussing a period in my life that was extremely painful at the time, and as the far reaching consequences have yet to be resolved, continues to this day to be difficult for me at times. I am not going to go into the details, but it came ...

This time we meet Paula from the north west of the UK 1 .How do you describe yourself, (crossdresser, transvestite, transgender) ? Transgender 2. How long have you been dressing? I don't 'crossdress' (hate that word). I dress, and have been doing it since I was 14, so that's 47 years now. 3. Acceptance was for me, the turning point, once I had accepted who I was my life changed. What about you? When did acceptance come to you, how did it change your life and outlook regarding dressing? Acceptance came after my divorce in 2007, when I decided to bring Paula out properly, and I have never looked back. 4. Have you ever considered transition? Would you consider it in the future? Yes I have, and still considering it now. 5. You seem very confident when dressed, but how do you really feel? I feel alive, and I feel the real me has come out, a feeling of contentment and happiness comes over me. 6. I know you get out and about, tell us ...

All of us are having a hard time at present there is no doubt about that. It is too easy to get yourself into a depressed mood and feel very negative about everything. I know, because I am an expert at it! I tend to overthink things and so have a terrible habit of going down the doomsday route! If we are fortunate enough to avoid contracting COVID-19, that is a big positive, the next thing we must do is follow our governments advice, here in the UK that means only going out when absolutely necessary and keeping a distance of two metres from other people. Have you managed that? Yes? Thats another positive. But now we have managed to keep ourselves and our family safe what's next? For crossdressers like me the coming weeks and months are going to be very difficult, those people that know me personally will know that Andrea will not be able to make an appearance, add that to the fact that I overthink things and we have a recipe for disaster! None of us want any more disasters in ou...

1.How do you describe yourself, (crossdresser, transvestite, trans gender) ? I do struggle a bit with labels. Partly because the definition of them shifts and language seems to be evolving. I usually say I'm Trans because I'm somewhere on that spectrum. The concept of being bigender seems to fit reasonably well. Whatever label applied, my nature doesn't switch off when I put on a shirt or dress: I'm always me, a mix of male and female. Perhaps that's true for more of us than we realise. 2. How long have you been crossdressing? I remember my first time was in late primary school. I saw a pair of tights fresh in the laundry pile and I wondered what they felt like. I mean, why don't boys wear these? So began the journey...:-) I couldn't tell you my age, but I've been dressing on and off when I had the opportunity. It just seemed right. That this was part of me, even if I didn't know that back then. 3. Acceptance was for...

I don't think any one of us predicted the situation the whole country has found itself in today........... Coronavirus has taken a huge toll on our population, but unfortunately we are only at the beginning and it will, without doubt, get significantly more serious as time goes on. By the end of it there will be very few, if any, within the UK that does not personally know someone who has succumbed to this terrible virus......... The UK is currently in a state of almost suspended animation, work is continuing -  just -  people that are lucky enough to be able to work form home are in many cases continuing, many have been put on furlough , that is 80% of their wages are paid by the government if the company has to close down, or shed a number of staff due to the downturn in work. Some companies top up the wages so the staff receive their normal weekly pay, but many do not. As a result many families have suddenly had a 20% cut in income, but it's better than nothing at ...

This is the life story of Caroline Cossey a transgender model, actress, showgirl and activist, first published in 1991 it charts her life from a young boy right through to becoming a bond Girl. and beyond. Born Barry Cossey in 1954 she grew up with a loving family at Brooke in Norfolk. I was stunned at how closely her young life experiences mirrored my own life, and I suppose that of many people growing up to discover they are not as society expects.  This  fascinating and inspirational story, extremely well written and very readable, takes us through the events of her life form childhood through troubled adolescence, her time as a crossdressing show girl, breast implants, top less dancing, page three girl, GRS, her time in the Bond film 'For Your Eyes Only'. Sadly there was always a constant threat of disclosure, eventually her world came crashing down with a damming article in the 'News of The World' She fought back only the be dealt another devastating blow by...

I was reading an article the other day in which the author expressed her annoyance of people assuming the most basic of things. In her case it revolved around the simple question "tea or coffee?' It wasn't the fact that she had been offered a hot drink it was the assumption that she would consume one or the other, tea or coffee, as if there could not possibly be any other choice. On a TV breakfast program (in a similar vein) here in the UK the other day, when talking about football (soccer to our American friends) one presenter asked another "which team do you support?" to which the reply was "Spurs". My instant thought was that the initial question should be "do you follow football" if the answer was yes then ask what team he supported. My next thought was that has this person answered with "Spurs" because it is the truth, or because it is easier to just go along with the assumption. In my youth at school the expected thing for...

This is the time of the year when most of us reflect on the past year and look forward to the next twelve months. I started this blog in February so not quite a year yet but this is the most appropriate time to review progress so far. This is the first time I have written a blog so I hope you will forgive me for any mistakes that have crept in along the way.  2019 has certainly been an exciting year and worked out in a way I could never have imagined at this point in 2018. I have been lucky enough to have several trips to Pink Punters, every visit has been a success and very enjoyable. I have met up and become great friends with a number of girls,  this I have to say has been a very satisfying experience. Just having like minded friends I can meet up with and chat to has given me the confidence to go further and do more. The girls introduced me to cocktails, not my thing in boy mode, but I have started to take more of an interest and my willingness to try some more has gr...

Christmas is a great time of the year, true it can be stressful in the run up to the big day but in the end most of us enjoy the Christmas period. However for a crossdresser it can also be a very difficult time. I, like many crossdressers, do not have universal approval from my family so it will not be possible for me to dress as I would like to, not only on Christmas day itself but for around three weeks over the festive period.  As Andrea I do get out once a month and also have some time to be me at home, which compared with many is a fortunate place to be, but as Christmas is such a special time I have always dreamed of wearing my favourite dress and heels during this time, maybe not on Christmas Day itself but on one day at this time of year. Unfortunately that is just not going to happen due to family commitments and other circumstances. Now many would say I am already very lucky being able to enjoy my regular outings, and I would agree, but being without Andrea for three...