mylifebyandrearaven

 You would think this is something very simple and something everyone has....... But during my  life, having respect for my true self has been difficult if not impossible. I have spent most of my life trying to be something I wasn't instead of doing my best to be something I really am. Anyone, like me who was born to this crossdressing life will have had a very difficult time growing up. These days it is easier as the society of today is much more forgiving than the one I grew up in despite some of the current moves to restrict trans people. My life has constantly evolved during the time I have been on earth, it still is, but for many years it evolved in the wrong direction as I tried, and failed miserably, to be the person society deemed I should be. There was no hand book, no instruction manual, no support and no help, there was just negativity. What ever I did, seemed to be wrong, I was constantly being told how to live my life, how to conform. I was seen by some to be weak and 

   The best photographs tell a story, unless you are extremely lucky you will have to invest time and effort to create the perfect picture. Firstly you have to decide what story you want to tell, if it is a bride on her wedding day it is fairly easy to photograph her outside the church or signing the register, however if you are using a photo to illustrate a story, obviously the photo has to have a direct connection with the narrative. To do that the connection with the story has to be obvious, but you also have to get it in context, for example the first photo below it not only had to have the connection with the story but also fit into the time frame. A modern electric sewing machine would have been out of place so everything needed to be in period.  When you are trying to create a 'period' photograph you firstly have to do your research, the items in the image have to be correct, if you go for a period 'look' then you can be a little more relaxed but overall the phot

 Every so often on various forums the subject of 'Dressing Your Age' or dressing in age appropriate clothing comes up, to be greeted with various comments from different points of view. First of all what are we talking about here? The subject often gets confused with inappropriate clothing as a result when, people respond to a post on a forum they are quite often talking about slightly different subjects. Dealing with inappropriate clothing first, to my mind this would be wearing clothes that are not right for the situation you are in, clothes that clearly do not suit you or exposing more of your body than is decent. The problem with many crossdressers, as Helen Boyd pointed out in her book (My Husband Betty) is that many dress in a way that they, as men, would like women to dress.  If I think back to my youth, a very long time ago, when people (men and women) got to a certain age and their style of clothing remained the same from then on. Part of this was the cost of clothing

Make do and mend  We hear a lot about fast fashion and and how cheap low quality clothing is sold to consumers and has a relatively short life before being thrown away.  However my experience is that it is not always cheap clothing that falls into this category, often perfectly good (better quality) clothing becomes discarded because it is no longer 'on trend'. This, I believe is the real problem. I come from a generation where clothing was expensive and money was short so any item of clothing had to last and would be used until it was no longer possible to wear it as it had worn out. Items of clothing would be passed down from older to younger members of the family in order to extend the useful life of the garment. There was never any consideration of fashion or what might be 'on trend'.  This way of thinking was influenced by the rationing of clothes from 1939 until 1949, an subsequent years of austerity where money was tight and clothing relatively expensive. Disposi