The Dress

 

I have always had a thing about wedding dresses, I suppose that could be common for lots of people, both male and female, because they are in general the most spectacular dress a woman will ever wear, and of course on that special day only the best will do. I think my interest was aroused when my eldest sister got married, over fifty years ago now, as a young boy with more than a passing interest in all things feminine the wedding and bridesmaids dresses held a fascination for me. Obviously I never had a clue as to why an outwardly run of the mill boy would have such an interest, I never discovered the reason for that for decades. But the interest was there, I never saw the dresses before the wedding, so it was something special for me on the (very cold) day.  I had to go in a boring suit and tie, my Mum even had to bribe me to wear it! 

I did try my sisters dress, long after the wedding, which was a lovely experience, nobody knew of course and I had no idea at the time why I had this urge, but then the opportunity was lost and I never wore another wedding dress, until now.

For the whole of my life I have had this interest bubbling away at the back of my mind. I had often looked at wedding dresses on eBay but never took the plunge, after all where would I wear it? Even on one of our girly nights out, it would hardly be appropriate evening wear.  I have talked about these dresses to a number of other crossdressers but most seem to have no more than a passing interest and apart form one who is much more enthusiastic, none seem to have any real interest at all. When I mentioned it to a female friend, she was positively dismissive, perhaps her wedding day experience was not all the fairy tale experience she was hoping for?

Last December, in yet another lockdown here in the UK I was scanning through eBay not looking for anything in particular but after a number of lockdowns, and other restrictions, I was just looking to see what goodies I could find. I looked at wedding dresses, there were, as usual, lots on offer, but most were in three figures, which as it was definitely not a must have, was far too expensive for me. Then I stumbled across a seller advertising ex shop samples, all were new, but had obviously been tried on countless times by perspective brides and may have had the odd very minor blemish. The prices were more affordable, about £90 I think, but I judged still too much with something that was after all just a whim. Then as I went back for another look a few days later the price started to drop, it was in the end reduced several times until it came down to £59.99 which for a £425 dress was obviously cheap, then the seller added an offer, buy this dress for the price advertised and buy another for only £19.99, so in effect two dresses for £40 each. Now they were talking my language! As there was not another wedding dress in the style that I liked in my size I opted for a long pink strapless number and duly placed the order. The items arrived, but as time was strictly limited I only had time for a quick try on and then put them in the cupboard. 

Earlier this year the subject of wedding dresses came up when talking to another lady friend, although she said that her wedding dress was a mistake, which only became apparent on the day, she could understand my desire to wear a wedding dress. I admitted I had purchased one, but felt a bit ashamed, partly because of the cost, but also as I was somewhat embarrassed about my desire. However she understood completely why I should want to wear a dress of this type, and put it very succinctly, 'every little girl dreams about wearing a beautiful wedding dress, why shouldn't you?' That was the thing I never got, the connection I had been searching for, she saw me as that little girl who wanted to wear a beautiful dress, I had never seen that in myself until that point. Then all of a sudden it made complete sense to me. If I had been given the chance to go to the wedding as a bridesmaid, I would have jumped at it. That was not to be of course, young boys didn't do that back then, but I have dreamed of just that possibility ever since. 

A few days ago the opportunity finally came about, and I took the plunge and tried the dress properly for the first time. corset style dresses are not easy to put on correctly by your self, but after somewhat of a struggle I managed it. OK, it need some adjustments and tweaking , nothing much, but those final details to make it just right. I have to think about my hair and if I could style it more appropriately for a wedding, and I need to do my nails.......

Once on I felt a tingle go down my spine, a sense of happiness, comfort and wellbeing and emotion. Yes emotion, quite a lot of emotion, in fact, the whole experience was almost overpowering, but very uplifting. I had finally managed to wear a wedding dress after over forty years, something I will never forget. I will repeat the experience as soon as I can, but that is unlikely to be very soon as life is likely to get in the way. But when I do, I will rectify the adjustments and tweaks, and do something with my hair to get it just right....................